That Sounds Silly...

... learn some English. This time around, I'm putting a spin on things. Instead of going after the uneducated hics, I'm flaming the English language instead. People who insist English is the perfect language obviously miss the glaring flaws the language has, and they don't notice that it happens to be a poorly assembled patchwork project we just happen to use in order to communicate. For example, look at read. It can be pronounced as both 'read' and 'red', and it's used interchangeably.

Here's another inconsistency: comb, bomb, and womb begin with one different letter, and none of the words rhyme. Furthermore, all three words have a silent b, but bomb begins with a b, which does get pronounced, while the b at the end is silent. How the hell is a noob supposed to know the difference? What kind of sadistic jerk puts a silent b into words that don't need a silent b? I can tell you who: the same jackass who puts a hidden coin block at the very crest of an important chasm jump that sends you cursing to your death.

So, since we know the last letter for some words are not safe to pronounce, the first letter must be safe, right? Haha, no. Say hello to pneumonia, psychiatry, and knock. Remember bomb? The exact opposite rule applies for knock. Now the first k is silent, and the last k isn't. The coin block just moved and now you are down two lives and ready to throw your controller at the TV. But wait, there's more. While we are here, let's talk about know. It begins with a silent k, and ends with a silent w. So, you can't pronounce it as kuh-now, kuh-no, or now. It's pronounced as no. But know can't be spelled as no, because no already means no.

Finally, silent letters can also appear anywhere in between a word too. Debt has a silent b, and drought has the g AND the h silent. And don't even get me started on why arch and architect are pronounced in different ways. The bottom line is this: English sounds silly. It's far from perfect, and it just happens to be convenient for you because you happen to speak it. Give Juan from the taco truck a break just because he didn't have several years of grade school to figure this whole mess out. What I wrote is the truth, and it sounds completely absurd. Now you know why some people don't give a wholehearted effort to learn the language.